I'm a couple of days late posting this, but despite having a pretty rough TOM, I lost another 2 pounds. Needless to say, I am pleased. Eating and exercise are going pretty well. I am trying!
I'd like to thank everyone for your kind and encouraging words. Your comments have made accepting the additional 10 pounds a lot less painful. I am so grateful to have found such caring and supportive friends on the Web and I appreciate you more than I can say. You guys are great! Now that I've accepted things, I feel my motivation returning. I'm feeling stronger each day and am determined to continue my journey and not stop until I reach my goal.
Today was a beautiful day in Houston. The temperature was around 75 degrees, it was quite breezy and I took advantage of the lovely weather this afternoon. I normally do my workouts during early morning hours, but I woke up feeling yucky this morning (PMS) and in slow motion. So, I just went with it. Had my breakfast, watched my usual Saturday morning line up (Recess, That's So Raven and Proud Family - I LOVE those cartoons!) and chilled as I started putting together my new Progress Chart and Exercise Log. I hope to have them online sometime this evening.
I finally started feeling better so I showered and hit the gym at 2pm. I had a GREAT workout! After my 13 min. warm-up on the treadmill, I hit the weights for 30 min. I lifted my heaviest weight since I started in February (details in my Exercise Log). Afterwards, I headed out to Braes Bayou and did a 90 min., 4.5 mile walk. It was AWESOME! I started my walk at 3:00 and finished at 4:30. The sun kissed my face and the continuous breezes kept me cool the entire time. A perfect balance! I managed to burn 820 calories today and it felt great.
The weather seems to be consistently nice now, so I decided to add a long, outdoor walk to my routine to help prepare me for running when the time comes. The plan is once a week, early Saturday morning after the gym. Since I already walk 3 miles (60 min.) on M/W/F mornings before going to work, I intended to start with a 2 hour, 5 mile walk, but I hadn't quite measured the distance correctly. I used to regularly walk (and run -- 80 lb. ago) the bayou, so I knew the stretch I did today was somewhere between 4 and 5 miles, but I didn't remember exactly. I measured the distance after I finished and it turned out to be 4.5. I'll make the adjustment next Saturday.
On the dietary front, things have been going well the past few days. I've managed to stay pretty much within my calorie range most of the time and today I almost hit my 40-30-30 ratio perfectly for the first time. I'm also getting better with my water intake. I am so pleased. I have a feeling that things will continue to get better. I'm feeling more focused and motivated these days and I'm determined to make a fantastic comeback.
Well, I'm off to finish up my progress chart and exercise log. Hopefully I'll get them online before I go to bed so that I'll be able to make my cyber rounds and check on my peeps tomorrow.
Hope everyone is having a beautiful, relaxing weekend. :o)
It's been quite some time since I posted. Nearly four weeks, actually. I'd like to thank all my buddies for leaving such lovely comments in my absence. It sure feels good to know that you guys are there. I'm just sorry that I was away so long and haven't been visiting you. But know that I'll be by to see you all very soon. I'm back, but quite honestly, I'm not certain about how things will be going forward. The only thing I know for sure is that I'm going to give it my best shot.
Not a lot has transpired since I last posted, but a few things have changed. One being a rude awakening about my weight. Here's the deal. I normally weigh in on Mondays and after my last post my next weigh-in was supposed to be March 1. Well, I took a sneak peak on Sunday, Feb 29 and my weight was unchanged at 220. Now I knew I had been out of control most of that week (as I stated in my last post of Feb 28), so this really should have been no surprise to me, right? Well, I don't know what came over me, but I just lost it, the end result being an irreversibly damaged scale. By the next morning (March 1) I had regained my composure and vowed to get a grip and just start over. I managed to get myself to the gym for my usual 6am workout. I decided since I had broken my scale, I would use the gym scale for my Monday weigh-in until I could get to the store after work and buy a replacement. This is when all hell broke loose.
I pranced into the gym all happy and feeling pretty good about starting over. I jumped on the doctor's office type scale with the expectation of seeing 220, plus or minus a pound or two, but what I saw caused my heart to sink. 230!!! What??? Without shoes and wearing very light clothing. I couldn't believe it. I must have stayed on that scale for five minutes tinkering with it, desperately trying to make it show a number somewhere close to 220. Surely this must be an error. "This scale must not be properly calibrated," I screamed. The attendants came rushing over. One of the personal trainers checked the scale and showed me that it was balanced at zero. I just couldn't accept that. I didn't want to hear that. The scale MUST be wrong. I just weighed yesterday and I was at 220, dammit!
So, I gather myself, put my shoes back on and went upstairs to do my workout. This news haunted me the entire day. All I could think of was getting a new scale to prove that the gym scale was wrong. After work, I tore out to the store, bought a nice Health-O-Meter digital model, raced back home, tore open the box, and jumped on. 230! 230! 230! Aaaaaaaaah!!!!!! Noooooooo!!!!!! This cannot be!!!!! I got on and off the scale at least 20 times, moving it from place to place. I weighed myself in the bathroom, the kitchen, the hallway, the front porch...anyplace without carpet. Still no change. It was now clear to me that the scale I had been using for the last couple of years was seriously off the mark. I was devastated.
The last time I updated my stats was Feb 23. At that time, I THOUGHT my weight was 220. I mean, that's what my scale told me, right? Well, I've had a few weeks to absorb and process this shock. I've accepted it and made peace with the fact that I've been 10 pounds heavier all this time and didn't even know it. Rather than go back and try to adjust all my numbers, I've decided to just take it from 230 on March 1. The only number I will adjust is my highest weight of March 2003, which was actually about 256 instead of 246. The good news is that I still lost 26 pounds last year. And as of Monday, March 22, I have lost 4 of the 230 pounds. I'm now at 226 and I will post my stats again as soon as I figure out how I want to do them.
I've heard some say that the scale is not important, but I don't buy that. No way! I mean, I realize it's not ALL about the scale, but when you're a 5' 5" woman weighing in at 250+, believe me, it IS about the scale to a large degree. I cannot get fit and healthy and remain anywhere near 250, so let's get real. For me to tell myself that the scale really doesn't matter at this size would be, in a word...CRAZY!
I've had a lot of time to think during my short hiatus and after much reflection on my over-the-top behaviour, I believe this experience has actually been good for me. It forced me to get honest with myself and admit that weighing myself daily was excessive. I realized that I needed to stop this ridiculous obssession. So I took the new scale back to the store and I'm now using the gym scale exclusively. Once a week. That's it. I'm sure I'll buy another scale one day, but for now, the gym scale will be enough.
Instead, I've chosen to slow my role, cool my jets, be more patient with myself during this process, and not look to the scale as the sole indicator of my success. I've decided to focus more on the changes I need to make and work 'em. I believe that if I do that, the results WILL follow.
Not the
average girl in the videos, that's for dang sure. Lover of
jazz, good wine, green and chai teas. Sometimes serious, often
playful, always intelligent. Strong at times, weak at
others. Decent looking on the regular, sexy when I wanna
be. Hater of BS and drama, minder of my own bizness. Still
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Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be
brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?'' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't
feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory that is within us. It's not just some of us; it's in
every one of us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
—Marianne Williamson
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Not the
average girl in the videos, that's for dang sure. Lover of
jazz, good wine, green and chai teas. Sometimes serious, often
playful, always intelligent. Strong at times, weak at
others. Decent looking on the regular, sexy when I wanna
be. Hater of BS and drama, minder of my own bizness. Still
not satisfied? Click 
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