Okay, I've gotten out of control over here again. Been allowing stress to send me on a fantastic eating/drinking voyage, as can be seen in my food log for the past couple of days.
Yesterday was a pathetic eating day for me and this morning hasn't been much better. In addition to some personal stress, I had an unusually stressful day at work. Not that I'm making excuses. Just the facts. Mind you, this was not my worst eating day (I've had a few worse), but it was sad, nontheless. Not only did I bust the hell out of yesterday's calorie allowance, the nutrition from the foods I ate was quite poor, with the exception of calcium. I was way above on that, so at least I'm doing my bones and teeth some good.
Things started off pretty well yesterday morning, but rapidly descended into an ugly downhill slide after lunch. One of my downfalls was those *bleep* Wendy's chicken nuggets, of all things. No more of those for a while. Oh, and uh, that bottle of Riesling (white wine) I imbibed during the evening pretty much nailed it!
Note to Self:I must start dealing with my stress in more effective, non-destructive ways instead of eating and drinking to anesthetize the pain.
Last, but not least, my water consumption SUCKED and I didn't exercise yesterday or Thursday. Hopefully, today will be better. Here are yesterday's sorry *bleep* digits:
Calories 2,585 | Carbs 28% | Protein 22% | Fat 27% Alcohol 23% | Water 54 oz. | Exercise - None
I need to regroup, refocus and figure out what's eating me. Taking a time out to muse, set new boundaries, revise my game plan. Be back when I've regained my composure and figured out a new approach.
Just a quick update. I weighed yesterday morning and, just as I expected, no (scale) loss last week. But hey, good news is that there was no (scale) gain either. I'm happy for that. I did lose a couple of inches, though, so that's kool. I think the affects of my weight training are starting to show. :o)
I had unexpected company on Sunday...and...they brought wine...and...I was weak! So, I didn't finish the exercise log or update my stats. Hopefully, I can get to that this evening. In the meantime, here are the digits from yesterday and the weekend:
Yesterday - Feb 23:
Calories 1,752 | Carbs 31% | Protein 36% | Fat 34% Water 96 oz. | Calories Burned: 370*
*Walking - Outdoor track, 65 mins. 3 miles, 3mph
Sunday - Feb 22:
Calories 1,939 | Carbs 21% | Protein 27% | Fat 31% Alcohol 21% | Water 70 oz. | Exercise: Skipped
Saturday - Feb 21:
Calories 1,571 | Carbs 37% | Protein 25% | Fat 38% Water 80 oz. | Exercise: Rest Day
After a somewhat disastrous week of logging my food, I FINALLY wised up and started using FitDay. I've definitely learned a lesson about not entering my data on a daily basis. I do pretty well logging my food during the day because I use a simple paper food log to record calories, carbs, protein and fat for breakfast, lunch and daytime snacks. The problems start when I get home from work. I noticed my tendency to procrastinate. Instead of entering the stats into my spreadsheet straight away, I've been letting the logs accumulate and then I try to enter them all in one sitting. Bad idea. To make things worse, a couple of days this week I didn't write down my evening meals until the next day and I truly believe that I have forgotten a couple of things I ate.
Another big problem is that I can't find my calorie counter (book) and I'm having to search the Net to get nutritional values for everything that is not packaged. This can be VERY time consuming, not to mention having to convert the numbers when portion sizes don't match up. This is probably the main reason I've been delaying entering my data.
This morning I decided to give FitDay a shot. I entered everything I ate yesterday and to my surprise, the FitDay calculations were within 10 calories and about 3 percentage points of my spreadsheet calculations. Needless to say, I will be using FitDay from now on. Their system even allows you to customize foods and the program remembers them. This is great considering that I regularly eat many of the same foods. Compared to the way I've been doing things, FitDay is awesome. I actually joined FitDay around mid-March 2003, but never used it. I'm sorry I waited so long to jump on the bandwagon. I've been needlessly torturing myself. *sigh*
As for weigh-in on Monday, I'm not very hopeful for another loss this week. I've been exercising faithfully and I'm doing a pretty good job getting my water in, but my eating is another story. Monday thru Friday was way higher than I had planned. For the most part, I've managed an average calorie intake of around 2,000 per day. I don't know if it's the exercise, vitamins, lack of discipline or all of the above, but my appetite seems to have increased this week. Hopefully, I can get myself back on track today and keep my calories within my set range of 1,500 to 1,800 per day.
I've worked out 4 days this week and will hit the gym again tomorrow. I also stepped up my weight training routine a bit. I increased my sets from 2 to 3 and increased my reps from 10 to 15. This pushes my routine from around 30 minutes to 45. I'm in the process of creating a new exercise log that will detail my workouts by month so that I can see exactly what I'm doing. I plan on having it completed before the weekend is over.
That's it for now. I'm off to browse around the FitDay site to see what other tools they offer that will simplify my life. I may suck it up and enter all of my food from this week, but I'm not sure. I will update my food/stats log by Sunday night, though.
More later.
*** It's later now. - 8:55 PM ***
Okay y'all, for me, FitDay is arguably one of the best Web-based, nutrition and weight management tools I've run across so far. Not to mention that it's free! The programs on this site not only calculate protein, carb and fat values for you, they also track them and display the values in grams, calories and percentages. It even generates a pie chart (graph). It also tracks alcohol (my beloved Merlot!), which has been a bit of a mystery for me until now. I'm very happy about this. The food customization feature allows you to enter food data straight from package labels. I love it!
You can also set nutritional and weight loss goals and there are several helpful reports you can use to see exactly how you're stacking up against the goals you've set. It even has a nutrition report that shows you the vitamins and minerals that are in your food and compares them to the RDA (recommended daily allowance). This is so kool. There are so many features I can't begin to list them all here. You'll just have to take a test drive and see for yourself. Can you tell I'm excited?
Achieving my 40-30-30 ratio of carbs, protein and fat (respectively) is proving to be more of a balancing act than I first thought. Using FitDay's tools today reinforced my understanding of this delicate balance and reminded me of how extremely important it is to plan my meals in advance (whenever possible) if I'm going to consistently meet my dietary goals.
I've already planned my meals and entered my food for today. I didn't hit my carb-protein-fat balance as I had hoped, but I did keep my calories around 1,570, which is way down from the past five days. The ratio would have been a lot better, but after a nerve-wrecking, taxing experience at the zoo grocery store, I ended up eating sardines and crackers again. Tomorrow should be better. I have everything I need to cook a nice, healthy dinner and several meals for next week. I can see now that using FitDay is going to enhance my weight loss journey and make this part of my life a WHOLE lot easier!
Calories 1,571 | Carbs 37% | Protein 25% | Fat 38% Water 100 oz. | Exercise - Rest Day
Jus' jumped off the scale and I've dropped another 2 lbs. Yep, I slid past the diet gods again last week, with wine in tow. Actually, I should have lost a bit more, but considering ALL the Merlot I guzzled sipped during this Valentine's weekend, I'm grateful that each of those little pounds is out the door (don't let the doorknob hit cha, fellas!). But hey, I had a great weekend and now I'm back on the straight and narrow...well, at least until the next holiday! *wink*
Since I have finally lost the 10 pounds I gained after I stopped my plan in June 2003, I will be losing virgin pounds from this point forward. Plus, being at 220 (which is where I left off in June) puts my total loss back to 26 lbs., which means I have also met Goal #2 - to lose 10 percent (25 lbs.) of my starting weight. That ROCKS! Now I can move on to Goal #3 and start receiving my rewards.
Haven't posted in a few days. Not much happening at the moment. Jus' kickin' back, maxin' and relaxin' with some smooth jazz and my favourite wine. Thought I'd come on for a sec and say that, so far, this week has gone well. Got four days of workouts under my belt and planning to hit the gym again in the morning. Yeeeeah, baby! Food is going pretty well, too. Oh, and uh, did I finally get hip about the treats? Mos def! Bump the ice cream sandwiches. Now I'm managing things so that I can indulge my passion for sipping Merlot. Hey, I've decided that when I choose to spend some extra calories, I'mma go for what I know. Can't get no buzz off of ice cream sandwiches. Feel me? Yep! Yep! I'm coolin'.
As of Wednesday, I resumed tracking and will start posting my protein and fat intake along with carbs. And to make it more meaningful for me, I decided to calculate and post the percentages of each in relation to total daily calories consumed. It's a bit more work and takes more time, but I need to do it so that I can see just where I am. I've also adjusted my plan (again) just a bit. Hey, I'm trying to find my balance, right?
For now, I've decided on a different mix of my 40-30-30 ratio. I noticed that during my workouts I was feeling a bit sluggish on only 30% carbs, so rather than 40% protein and 30% carbs, I flipped it. It's now 40% carbs, 30% protein and 30% fat. Daily calorie range remains unchanged (1,500 to 1,800). So far, this feels better for me. I'll give it a few weeks to see what affects, if any, the change has on my progress. I know I won't always hit the numbers, but I'm striving to eventually be at least somewhere in the ballpark -- most of the time anyway. Hopefully, all will be well and I'll drop another two pounds next weigh-in (Monday).
I haven't posted any digits for the past four days, so here they are:
[56.]In 2003, what was the best thing about your weight loss program? In 2003, what was the worst thing about your weight loss program?
The best thing was that it worked quite well. I lost 26 lbs. in about 11 weeks. The worst thing was that I stopped when I started a new job. What a HUGE mistake that was. Had I stuck to my guns, I'd be nearly done by now! *sigh*
[58.]Do you often go to the store with the best intentions not to buy junk food, but when you get to the car, your bags are full them? Do you stick to a list? Do you go hungry? Do you avoid the "impulse" aisles? Do you have a secret to staying on course with your weekly shopping trip?
No, yes, no, yes and not really. I rarely buy junk food on my weekly shopping trips. When I do, it's almost always premeditated. About 95 percent of the time I make a list and stick to. I try to avoid shopping when I'm hungry. I learned a long time ago that shopping while hungry is BAD news. I will actually eat something before I go, if necessary, to avoid any confusion when I get there. I almost always avoid the "impulse" aisles. I pretty much have tunnel vision when it comes to grocery shopping. I hardly ever play the "stop-and-taste-the-samples" game. There's no secret to staying on course. I usually just get in, get what I need and get out. Period!
Against all odds, I managed to drop 2 pounds this weigh-in. Not quite what I had hoped for at the start of the week, but all things considered, I'll take 'em and run. I guess the diet gods were asleep Sunday.
Calories: 1,265 Carbs: 94 g Treats: Zero - They're all GONE! Water: 104 oz. Calories Burned: 320*
Unsolved Mystery No. 956: Why Can't I Eat Just One?
Okay, now I think know I need a serious time out -- fa' REAL! You know, like you give little kids when they misbehave. Yep! I never cease to amaze me. Did I not post just yesterday that things are going very well and I'm quite motivated? Did I not post of how pleased I've been with myself this week? Well, kiss me all over. I've managed to defy all logic, yet again!
Instead of taking my arse to bed around 10pm like I had planned, here I am still up watching comedy telly, lurking about the kitchen during commercials, playing mind games with my calories. I allowed my inner child (she is so immature) to trick me again. Sure did. Once more I abandoned common sense and let this chick talk me into what I will call a "mini controlled binge" of sorts. I don't know if it's the crack sugar in them or what, but I just ate three ice cream sandwiches worth a total of 510 COMPLETELY empty calories and 75 virtually worthless carb grams (not to mention the fat content). I would have to walk for nearly two hours to balance that out. Hmmm, that's an idea.
Anyway, what's even worse about the situation is that I deliberately waited until 12:01am before eating them so that I could feel better (temporarily) about it by subtracting those calories and carbs from today's (Sunday) already-lower-than-usual allowance. Now how conniving is that? And the grand finale? I'm sleepy now and going to bed on that mess. Is that INSANE or what? This episode was so ridiculous I just had to laugh out loud.
*shaking my head*
Revelations: My thinking can be so warped at times. I cannot be trusted with ice cream sandwiches. I still ain't ready.
But seriously, this self-sabotaging, inconsistent behaviour is truly a mystery to me. It is evident that I have some tough work ahead regarding self-discipline and my relationship with food. Maybe my body is trying to tell me something. Could it be that I am addicted to sugar? Am I deficient in some vitamins, minerals or other nutrients? Are there too few complex carbs in my diet? Has the paralysis of analysis taken over? Perhaps I need to deal with some unresolved issues that have eluded my consciousness. Or is it that I need to simply stop playing with FIRE? I mean, was I actually so naive as to think I had mastered self-control in that area? I don't know, but I really need to get clear on a few things. One being that I must move beyond the madness and stop this deadly dance with overindulgence that is most certainly my undoing at the moment.
I will investigate and get this sorted, no doubt!
Note to Self: You might get a clue if you go ahead and move past page 36 of that book you're SUPPOSED to be reading!
I've decided to update my stats page and Quick Stats box (on the right) once a week on Mondays. That's about as often as I'll have time to do it. Next update will be on Feb 9. Hopefully there'll be some good news to report.
Things are going very well so far and I'm still quite motivated, but for some reason I'm just not in the mood to write. I've been wondering why I haven't practised my yoga in such a long time. I don't know what's up with that. Perhaps I'll write about it another time. My British programmes are on now, so I MUST go!
Calories:1,225 1,250 Carbs:58 62 g Ice Cream Sandwiches: 1 Water: 80 oz. Calories Burned: 332*
*Walking - Treadmill: 177, 35 min., 1.35 miles @ 2.6 mph *Weight Training: 155, 30 min.
I think I may have left off a few calories/carbs (no more than about 80), but I can't remember. Left my food log at the office. Will check when I get back there.
Didn't feel like writing when I got home. My PMS turned into TOM for my b-day, so I got off my feet, read a bit and went to sleep. But I still went to the gym! Hey, I really wanted my treat. Will update later this evening. I should be feeling better by then. Going back to bed.
Thank you to all who took the time to send me birthday wishes. An unexpected, but pleasant surprise, no doubt.
I am feeling quite proud of myself at the moment. I was a good little diva today. Well, kinda good. I admit that the thought of using my birthday as an excuse to throw caution to the wind and let it rip did saturate my mind for a brief moment, but common sense and good judgment prevailed for a change. I further confess that I went a bit overboard with almonds today. I had a few for breakfast, put some in my salad at lunch and had a few more as an afternoon snack (total of about 5 oz.). BUT, even with the almonds, my little birthday treat, and a nice roast beef dinner with french bread, I still managed to exceed my calorie limit by only 645. AND I still ate about 205 fewer calories that it takes to maintain my current body weight. Not bad for a birthday. It could have been a lot worse.
Calories: 2,445 Carbs: 112 g B-Day Brownies: 1 Water: 80 oz. Calories Burned: 0 (rest day)
I figure since my next weigh-in isn't until Monday, I can easily balance out these excess calories by shaving about 150 calories from each of the next four days and not really feel it that much. Hey, it's all about balance, right? I am pleased.
Nothing exciting to report. Since today is Wednesday, I didn't do anything unusual. I didn't even take the day off from work. My workday was peaceful and stress-free, just the way I like it. I am spending my evening relaxing in quiet reflection, giving thanks for my accomplishments, reviewing my goals, meditating, reaffirming my commitment to myself.
I feel like I'm starting to get my groove back! Yep, I think I am finding my balance.
Calories: 1,520 Carbs: 123 g Ice Cream Sandwiches: 1 Water: 64 oz. Calories Burned: 330*
*Walking - Treadmill, 35 min., 1.3 miles at 2.6 mph *Weight Training, 30 min.
Exercise in exchange for treats. Hmmm, kinda sounds a tad like food prostitution to me. Well, at least I kept my promise. Now let's see what tomorrow brings.
All afternoon my inner child was whining and begging for an ice cream sandwich. This conjured up memories of last summer's episode when I got carried away and had to cut myself off from buying them (details in the April 26, 2003 entry). On the drive home from work, I debated whether or not I am strong enough mentally prepared to handle eating just one. I mean, after the discipline issues I had last week, I just wasn't sure. At this point I'm wondering if I've gone mad to even think of doing such a thing.
Now mind you, in light of last summer's disaster, the very thought of having ice cream sandwiches (or any other high calorie dessert) in my freezer at this stage of the game is enough to make me slap somebody. Nevertheless, I decided to indulge her anyway, especially since her birthday is on Wednesday.
Being the economic shopper I am, I didn't buy just a single ice cream sandwich. Nope! I had the audacity to pick up a box of 12. (Yeah, I know, I'm a glutton for punishment.) Not only that, but somehow, a 6-pack of banana popsicles happened to appear in my bag when I got home. *Wonder how those got in there? I tell you that little chick is sumthin' else!*
Well, I'm happy to say, I had only ONE ice cream sandwich as an afternoon snack and only ONE popsicle after dinner. And guess what? No visions of ice cream sandwiches dancing in my head. I'm fine and satisfied. The bad news is that they maxed out my carb allowance for the day. The good news is that my total carbs were only 25 percent of my total calories, so I didn't exceed my 30 percent limit. The best news is that I stayed within my 1,800 calorie limit. Quite nicely I might add. Here are the digits:
Calories: 1,585 Carbs: 100 g Water: 86 oz. Calories Burned: 320*
*Walking - Outdoor Track, 60 min., 2.6 miles at 2.6 mph
The next challenge? To only eat either one ice cream sandwich (170 cals) or two popsicles (100 cals/50 each) tomorrow. I've decided that since I'm allowing that whining heffa to have treats, she CANNOT have both. Furthermore, she's only getting ONE on the days she moves her arse. No exercise, no treat! And if she can't handle that, I'll cut her off like a shot! Spoiled little brat. I tell you, kids are a trip!
Wishing everyone a productive and disciplined week. :o)
Yet another small (perhaps not so small) miracle has been bestowed upon me. I weighed in this morning and am pleased to announce that to my astonishment, there was no weight gain. Considering last week's food debauchery and my unforgiving PMS condition, I am amazed and most grateful.
If I play my cards right this week, I should see some progress next weigh-in.
Not the
average girl in the videos, that's for dang sure. Lover of
jazz, good wine, green and chai teas. Sometimes serious, often
playful, always intelligent. Strong at times, weak at
others. Decent looking on the regular, sexy when I wanna
be. Hater of BS and drama, minder of my own bizness. Still
not satisfied? Click here.
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be
brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous?'' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't
feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory that is within us. It's not just some of us; it's in
every one of us. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
—Marianne Williamson
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design by DivaFlava.com (Uhm, that would be me)
Not the
average girl in the videos, that's for dang sure. Lover of
jazz, good wine, green and chai teas. Sometimes serious, often
playful, always intelligent. Strong at times, weak at
others. Decent looking on the regular, sexy when I wanna
be. Hater of BS and drama, minder of my own bizness. Still
not satisfied? Click 
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